Shy and Introverted Masters – A Field Guide to Recognizing and Loving Them

When people think of a leader, the image that comes to mind is, more often than not, a dominant, assertive extrovert. In the West, extroversion has long been a coveted trait, and in workplaces you’ll find them being promoted more rapidly and getting better performance reviews. That’s exasperated by media and a huge personal growth…

Anticipation, Anxiety and the Butterflies

We all experiences anxiety, stress and the butterflies start fluttering in our stomach at different times in our life. Because what we do is transgressive and sometimes edgy, there’s a chance that it does happen more frequently or with higher intensity in our BDSM exploration. It might be when we hook up with people we…

It’s All Smoke and Mirrors

In my checkered career I’ve studied business, design and journalism, worked in PR, been a graphic designer and a magazine editor, and I now run my second design and advertising company. I’m what they call in Singapore, where I live, a “creative”. I’ve only recently started using that as a noun… I always thought it…

Quiz – What’s Your MBTI Personality Type?

In the famous Myers-Briggs Type Indicator, there are four possible pairs: • Introversion (I) or Extraversion (E) • Intuition (N) or Sensing (S) • Thinking (T) or Feeling (F) • Judging (J) or Perceiving (P) Briggs and Myers work is based on Jung’s theories of the 1920s, and it’s such an established personality typing that…

11 Tips for BDSM Negotiation with an Introvert

Introverts exhibit a very different set of social behaviours, and sometimes it’s hard for non-introverts to understand their different wiring. But please don’t be put off! When you bond with an introvert you invite someone into your life who likes quality rather than quantity, who will probably want to know you better (and deeper) than…

If BDSM Makes You Anxious, Dance To The Music

I was listening to an interview on the radio this morning with two orchestra conductors. Answering a question about whether they felt anxious before going on stage, both admitted that they did and described it as being like a “cocktail party in the head”. At this cocktail party, everyone is out to judge you. You…