Moving Beyond Maslow’s View of D/s and M/s Relationships

Most religions and moral systems see one of the great human problems as selfishness. A common and unifying philosophy is that personal development is a transcendence from the self to a larger purpose. Around the middle of last century, Abraham Maslow, Carl Rogers and others aimed to liberate and enlarge the self. This was the…

Can I Teach My Partner to be a Dominant?

You want it, but it’s just not on your partner’s radar. It’s really not uncommon, and it’s a commonly recurring chat topic on forums like Fetlife: I got married two years ago, and while we’ve been together I’ve suppressed my urge to be submissive due to him being mostly vanilla. He says he wants to…

Pushing Boundaries Without Breaking Limits

I’ve taken a little snip from a thread on Fetlife that encapsulates a common viewpoint of Domination that I think contains both myth and jargon: … its important to realize that we also have to push boundaries to help a sub grow. Otherwise you stay in your little box and never get outside it. That…

Quiz – What Kind of Submissive Are You?

We know our followers love personality tests and BDSM quizzes. It’s always fun to find out more about who we are. Of course, online tests and quizzes are not definitive of our personality, but they can be fun for self-discovery. Perhaps you’ll just be reassured, or perhaps you’ll discover something about yourself that you never…

When the “D” in Your D/s Dynamic Stands for Depression

Being a caregiver to someone with depression isn’t an easy thing to do. It is even harder in a D/s or Master/slave relationship. When mental health issues surface, they can often do so seemingly out-of-the-blue. In a D/s dynamic, this can destabilise or cause fluctuation in the power flows between the Dominant and the submissive….

Do Slaveboys Dream of Soft Pillows?

It’s only a week into my first full-time job and i have already been through a rollercoaster of ups and downs. Every morning i’m up at 5am, drive to work at 7:30am, finish around 8pm, and then get back home for dinner around 10pm. The routine is automated and self-repetitive. i’m feeding the big corporate…

What Makes Being a Cuck Hot For Me?

I have been involved in a semi-open polyamorous BDSM relationship with two rather mature men for a few years now. Our dynamic is a version of an oldguard leather household protocol, in which i am an owned slaveboy to a kind Master who are partnered with His pup. We live separately, and in the past…

The Feelz versus the Mind

“Being a slave is the hottest thing I have ever (ever!) experienced. And it definitely FEELS totally right to me.” “But, being a slave sometimes counters my inner beliefs…” The path down the transgressive route of Domination/submission or Master/slave isn’t a smooth rainbow ride. Many of us underwent quite immense amounts of self-doubt and reflection…

I’m a slave but not submissive

If you want to see sparks fly in an online forum, just mention how you are a slave, but not submissive. Not possible, you’ll hear from many. Do you submit to your Master? Of course you do, so you must be submissive. To talk about this I think we first have to separate out personality…