When the Fantasy Gets Real

Fantasy feels good. It’s malleable, predictable, controllable and mouldable. It’s shaped perfectly to fit into all our crevices and to stroke all our sensitive spots. Reality, on the other hand, is often uncomfortable, unpredictable and uncontrollable. WHERE IS THAT GREY LINE BETWEEN FANTASY AND REALITY IN BDSM? It’s probably worth asking, before going any further,…

Why is a Sadist?

I realised that we’ve used the term Sadist quite a lot on this site without ever really defining it. Even our Sadist’s Philosophy of Pain doesn’t really define the term. A sadist is a person who enjoys inflicting pain and/or humiliation on another, or observing others being hurt or humiliated, either for power and control…