Life in my household has a certain rhythm to it. It’s partly circadian rhythms — the natural rise and fall of the day and the patterns associated with that — and it’s partly a negotiated rhythm that is kept in place by protocol. I think of that as ritualistic rhythm. It starts and ends my…
Tag: protocol
Scene Etiquette and Leather Protocol: A Few Notes on High Protocol & In Closing (6/6)
by Ambrosio Part 1: General Principles Part 2: More Specific Guidelines Part 3: Cruising with Class Part 4: Play Parties Part 5: Flagging, Symbols and Rituals HIGH PROTOCOL IN PERSPECTIVE i can’t get all involved in what is ‘protocol’ and what is not… good grief, relationships are hard enough… i frankly just prefer to please…
Scene Etiquette and Leather Protocol: Flagging, Symbols and Rituals (5/6)
by Ambrosio Part 1: General Principles Part 2: More Specific Guidelines Part 3: Cruising with Class Part 4: Play Parties Part 6: A Few Notes on High Protocol & In Closing FLAGGING NOT FLOGGING Flagging refers to non-verbal signals that serve as very specific cues in the scene. Most of them originated from the Gay…
Being Old Guard Leather in a Modern World – The Constructivist Approach
We’re often prompted to label everything, even thinks that resist labeling. So, how do i categorise my own BDSM dynamic? Is it old guard or new guard? The way i see it is as a constructivist approach in practicing M/s dynamics. Does actual BDSM fantasy – like the one described by Gengoroh Tagame comics, or…
Scene Etiquette and Leather Protocol: General Principles (1/6)
by Ambrosio This is the first part of a 6 part series originally published as Play Nice: Some Notes on Scene Etiquette and Leather Protocol on Ambrosio’s BDSM Site. See the end of this article for more details. Part 2: More Specific Guidelines Part 3: Cruising with Class Part 4: Play Parties Part 5: Flagging,…
You’re a Dominant, Not a Therapist
I think it’s time we had a few words about mentor-type Doms, but I don’t want to be too harsh. They really are the nice-guys of our communities, and as the saying goes, “it’s the thought that counts”. You’ll know the ones I mean. They believe their role as Dominant is to guide their submissive…
Developing Rules for Your Relationship
If you’ve bounced in here from our previous article A Reverse Pyramid Look at Rules in BDSM Relationships, you might be thinking “well, he’s no fun” and it’s true, it wasn’t a particularly fun look at rule making. But, in that article I was talking about the newbie error of substituting rules for Dominance, and…
A Reverse Pyramid Look at Rules in BDSM Relationships
I think it’s common for Dominants/Masters who haven’t had a lot of experience with relationships to go into a new coupling issuing rules the way a parking inspector issues tickets. Way too many, way too quickly, and about all the wrong things. It’s understandable where this comes from. We quickly discover that Dominance/submission is a…
Being a Master – Why She Wants to be Submissive and How To Enjoy Your Slave
by Author Unknown Like all my writings, this is more for myself than anyone else. Dominance and submission (D/s) has always been a part of my life, both my greatest torment when not understood by either myself and those I shared my thoughts with, and finally the source of greatest contentment and pride when I…
Where Did Old School BDSM Go?
I watched a video this morning of how a book was produced. The lead type being set, then pressed. The trimming and folding and binding, and how the leather cover was attached. The comment by the person who posted the video was “Your Kindle can’t do this”. And, of course, it can’t. But that doesn’t…