If you’ve bounced in here from our previous article A Reverse Pyramid Look at Rules in BDSM Relationships, you might be thinking “well, he’s no fun” and it’s true, it wasn’t a particularly fun look at rule making. But, in that article I was talking about the newbie error of substituting rules for Dominance, and…
Category: Dominance
A Reverse Pyramid Look at Rules in BDSM Relationships
I think it’s common for Dominants/Masters who haven’t had a lot of experience with relationships to go into a new coupling issuing rules the way a parking inspector issues tickets. Way too many, way too quickly, and about all the wrong things. It’s understandable where this comes from. We quickly discover that Dominance/submission is a…
Shy and Introverted Masters – A Field Guide to Recognizing and Loving Them
When people think of a leader, the image that comes to mind is, more often than not, a dominant, assertive extrovert. In the West, extroversion has long been a coveted trait, and in workplaces you’ll find them being promoted more rapidly and getting better performance reviews. That’s exasperated by media and a huge personal growth…
Dominant Energy and the Small Drops That Are Life
The word “tired” is one of those clumsy English words (like “love”) that means a lot less without context. Is it “tired” like “haven’t had enough sleep”, “tired” like “just ran a marathon” or “tired” like “I’ve spent the day with a piled up inbox and the boss on my back”? Synonyms are a lot…
Buzzcuts and Head Shaving and Why It’s So Hot
by Peter B. Forced haircuts—the idea of an unwilling guy being tied or held down, pleading and then begging not to have his precious hair taken from him. Then the sudden click-thud as the clippers are switched on, and their hum morphing to a low buzzz as they move to his head… Buzzcuts, brush cuts,…
Power Play – Understand the Codes and Negotiations of Leather Love
by Bryan Van De Mark Consider this analogy: Let’s say you like roller coasters. There is a certain sense of thrill when you are locked into the seats and you crest that hill and go plummeting downward at speeds upwards of 60 mph. A friend suggests that maybe a bigger thrill is in order: bungee…
Zen and the Art of Dominance
In Zen Buddhism, there is the concept of ‘Nyo Ze’. It doesn’t translate well to English from the original Japanese, but a close match would be ‘like this, suchness.’ One great 13th Century Zen master – Dogen – said that in order to become a person of suchness, you have to first realize that you…
6 Warning Signs He’s Not a Dom, He’s an Asshole
Narcissists, bullies and other toxic people can be charming and exciting to be around when you first meet them. After all, bad boys are often what get our juices flowing. No offence intended to other Doms out there, but with all honesty there’s a fine line between toxicity and dominance and we’re actually sharing a…
Being a Master – Why She Wants to be Submissive and How To Enjoy Your Slave
by Author Unknown Like all my writings, this is more for myself than anyone else. Dominance and submission (D/s) has always been a part of my life, both my greatest torment when not understood by either myself and those I shared my thoughts with, and finally the source of greatest contentment and pride when I…
From Stray to Collars, A Personal Journey
my first collar was granted to me by my Master, in small petshop in rural Malaysia. My family doesn’t celebrate Christmas with presents, and my first collar came to me on Christmas Day, which made it even more meaningful. Master, who was my Mentor at the time, gave me two taps on my right shoulder…