MY OPINION ON THE LABELLING OF BPD AS A “DISORDER”
Whether borderline personality disorder (BPD) originates from nature or nurture is constantly being debated.
Personally, i disagree that BPD is a form of disorder. There is an underlying problem in judging a person who uses a very different lens to view the world as having a “disorder”. For instance, you may come from a lovely family, and your vision of human society is full of dreams and hopes. But for me, i may come from a very different background, and my vision of the human society is as pessimistic as the dead fish pulsing on the floor. Why is that, because of a different lens, i am labeled as having a “disorder” while your sunny vision isn’t?
Some may argue that the reality of the world is people dying everyday, or abuse happening somewhere in the world every minute of every day. Look it up, of course its true. Or, some may argue that an individual dealing with depression is just adopting a realistic point of view.
Simply by labelling someone as having a “disorder” is already adding weight to the shoulders of the individual. i understand the need for psychology to characterise and catogorise in order to study, but the name they have given to BPD is, in my opinion, not suitable and needs to be modified.
BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER – NATURE OR NURTURE?
This is constantly being debated and this is what i think.
While genetic factors can’t be disputed, environment is controllable. We can’t change our genes, but we can change our external conditions.
The problem with this is that BPD is highly associated with child abuse or some form of physical or mental damage during early age. Ironically, being a child means you aren’t capable of changing your external conditions.
i am a member of an activist group that protects stray dogs, and i have seen stray dogs that have had hot water poured over them and been badly abused, yet are still very friendly to humans. And i have seen stray dogs who have just been chased away and have become protective and mean.
Understanding whether BPD is genetic or a result of environment doesn’t matter much if you keep abusing your kid and not doing anything. And I personally think that attributing all or even a large part of BPD to nature is a dangerous thing to do. To me it implies that it is therefore “nobody’s fault” and something that is solely the individual with BPD’s responsibility to “cure” through changes they have to make to themselves.
HOW DID BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER FEEL?
i had a period where i felt intense hostility when i walked into a room full of people. my view was that every person has the ability to judge you — for the way you walk, the way you talk, the way you dress — and because everyone CAN judge, by all means i needed to protect myself from all the judgement. That made me a highly sensitive person.
And, i have been through intense depression, where the whole world just blurred out from my vision and i spent days lying on my bed under a dark cloud.
LEAVING THE SYMPTOMS BEHIND
Now, i live happily, with what i think of as a healthy perception of the world. i still often catch myself with a highly negative view of the world, but when that sets in i know how to zoom out from the negativity and zoom in on the positivity of life.
What i think has made the most difference is discovering this mysterious concept that other people called “balance”. Obvious to you perhaps, but something that i did not understand. There is really not much balance when you grow up in a family and school environment that beats you up, yells at you, calls you pig head and what not. It took a long time. It takes time to develop a different perception of the world. You need to be able to see “happiness” and “love” and all the good, in order to have a new lens to view the world in the opposite way to the way you always have.
Do i still have BPD?
i don’t think so. i think everyone have their own version of a lens/perception of the world. mine is slightly darker, due to my background, but at least i have the awareness to change the lens now. Life is mostly good, sometimes lonely, sometimes overwhelming, but it is mostly good.
i think most mental illness about extremes. It’s normality going off track and driving to the extreme end of the continuum. For example, negativity is normal. Everyone feels it sometimes. But when it is too much, you can collapse under the weight of it. Imagination is healthy and normal, too much it becomes hallucinations.
The crucial part, for me at least, is understanding “what is too much” and “what is balanced”.
With BPD, i think we all have the knowledge and understanding somewhere inside to hold the wheel and drive life back on track.
HOW ABOUT YOU?
Are you seeking therapy for borderline personality disorder or dealing with it on your own? Do you think it’s possible to get through it and leave it in the past?
• echo.me.uk – Basics of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)
• Yo Expert – Can Borderline Personality Disorder Be Cured?
• Association d’Aide aux Personnes avec un Estat Limite – Borderline Personality and Cure