WHAT IS CHASTITY?
It is simply a form of orgasm denial, with or without a chastity device, and with or without power exchange. Some may use a chastity device to enforce the process of orgasm denial, some may explore chastity simply by following orders to not touch the genitalia, or masturbate. As always, it’s a continuum of intensity and different methods enforcing it, for pleasure or spiritual journey, fun or discipline, or some mixture of those elements. Complexity is what makes it so much fun, as it allows individuals to explore the possibilities and their own personal desires.
i speak from an M/s dynamic that is very much rooted in TPE – Total Power Exchange. For me, chastity is another element to enhance the power exchange. It reinforces ownership – the ownership of my body by my Master.
There is no feeling more submissive than being granted a collar and having the lock snapped shut by a Master, as symbolism of the ownership of body and soul. Likewise with chastity, it locks down the most intimate part of the human body, the part that comes along with the most euphoric and mystical sensations of pleasure. Surrendering that most sensitive part of one’s body to the Dominant/Master, for me at least, is one of the strongest feelings i know of power transferred from one to Another.
This approach to chastity might not seem directly wired to eroticism, but eroticism is subtlety interwoven with power dynamics. The challenges of devotion is part of the eroticism and that’s what makes the idea of chastity so appealing to me. Am i ready to submit fully to my Master? Yes, and therefore it’s up to Him to decide how long He want to keep me locked under chastity. It’s one of His tool to manage His property.
CHASTITY AND LONG DISTANCE M/S RELATIONSHIPS
Master/slave (M/s) itself is challenging in the context of long distance relationships (LDR) and it can sometimes be quite painful. Can chastity manage to help, or perhaps make things worse, in an LDR context?
In an M/s and TPE context, chastity is going to train the mind to be devoted spiritually. Every erotic thought that comes into mind will soon be a reminder that one has lost the freedom to masturbate. There’s instant feedback that the body is owned.
With some time, “I want to have orgasm” begins to become “i am an owned slave”, “i love my Master”, “i am commited”, “i choose this path and this is the life i want”, etc. Chastity can become an approach to enhance the power spiritually, rather than for pleasure.
The problem in LDR is the distance. Having a strong devoted heart spiritually and mentally without being physically connected to your Owner can certainly be challenging. you are constantly reminded of the power dynamic that you both have, but you can’t physically hug your partner, nor can you look into His eyes and have Him reflect back, and give you the kind of certainty of “yes, i know”.
Chastity intensifies the sensations of craving for emotional needs and submission needs, and without the physical feeding of these needs it can be very challenging. This can lead to a term that i like to use – chastity edge. It’s that intense emotional feeling that is almost unbearable.
my personal approach is to internalise this challenge, and look at it as part of the texture of the journey.
At the risk of oversharing, i’ve been in chastity (with a cage) for more than a year now. When i’m with my Master the cage comes off, and He’s kind enough to give me release at other times when He wants to. But the cage is now part of me. i love that my body is His property and i love how the chastity is His in the same way that i am His.