We get a lot of queries about humiliation & degradation, specifically about practical ideas for things to do. Not every activity is suitable for every person, but here’s 90 fun ones.
I didn’t write these, they’ve been passed around on the internet for a while, and before we get into the fun bit I wanted to add four quick pieces of advice:
• Consent. Your kinks are private, the public doesn’t consent to participate in them. Freaking out the villagers or traumatising children is not cool. A lot of these suggestions are public displays, so you’ll need to use your common sense regarding when and whether they are appropriate.
• Humiliation is much more than just putting someone in an embarrassing situation. When it’s done right it’s a hot scene for both parties. I strongly recommend Richard Sprott’s excellent talk Humiliation: Hot, Edgy and Sometimes Dangerous for a deeper insight into what humiliation is and how you can play with it. Really, it’s a great video.
• Humiliation and degradation are edge play. Sometimes you can detonate land mines that no one knew were there. Keep an eye on your submissive and be very sure that he/she is not being psychologically triggered by the activities.
• Check out our article Erotic Humiliation and Degradation for some general discussion about humiliation and degradation and more ideas.
Now that that’s out of the way, see if there’s anything here that adds spice to your life:
Clothing the sub can be made to wear:
1. Black or dark colour bra under thin white shirt.
2. Black or dark colour panties under thin white trousers or shorts.
3. Tights worn with shorts.
4. Wear a frilly bikini at the beach. [or just the bottom].
5. Naked or dressed in lingerie beneath a cape or raincoat.
6. Wearing an obviously feminine blouse.
7. Little girls’ dresses with high heels
8. Baby hats/bonnets.
9. Wearing your dirty underwear to work with everyday male clothing.
10. Standard male shirt, tie, jacket, with obvious female trousers.
11. Diapers, noisy plastic pants.
12. High heels.
13. No underwear, while wearing very thin white or light colour trousers, shorts.
Toys:
1. Slave collar (can add owner tag.)
2. Narrow cat collar with bell.
3. Single handcuff on each wrist.
4. Butt plugs, Can be worn at a business meetings.
5. Feminine necklaces and bracelets.
6. Feminine rings.
7. Cock rings.
8. Nipple clips. [Even better when seen through a sheer shirt]
9. Clip on earrings [for the pierced impaired.]
12. A “kitty” collar with bell, worn around the cock and balls.
Shopping scenes:
[The assumption here is that it should be obvious the purchases are for the sub]
1. Shopping for and trying on lingerie or dresses.
2. Trying on high heels while wearing nylons or pantyhose under male clothing.
3. Shopping for makeup, perfumes, and other female items.
4. At adult toy stores, purchasing butt plugs, cockrings, and BD gear, while she watches from a distance.
5. Having a manicure or facial.
6. Buying adult incontinent supplies.
Other activities or scenes:
1. Must use “Mistress”, Madame”, or “Ma’am” at all times.
2. Handcuffed to the shopping cart, while shopping.
3. Handcuffed or tied to a pole outside shops. (Waiting for Mistress)
4. Handcuffed, hands in front or back, while shopping.
5. Metal cock rings, collars, chains, or leashes when going through airport security.
6. Having him get a good tan while wearing a bra, for later exposure at the beach or while washing the car without a shirt.
7. When at a restaurant, eating in an unusual way; being fed by the Mistress; using your non dominant hand, no utensils.
8. Forbidden to speak in public.
9. Kneeling and kissing her boots, shoes, feet, or hands, at odd moments.
10. Kneeling, massaging her feet at the cafe.
11. One arm tied or cuffed under your shirt, or cuffed obviously behind you.
12. Pockets cut out of pants, and hands tied or cuffed to your thighs so you can’t remove them from
the pockets.
13. Binding your cock inside your pants with the string or rope end available to tug on.
14. Wearing a vibrating butt plug, with the controls in your pocket.
15. Your right [left?] hand is tied to your cock and balls through a hole in your pocket. Might look like you are playing with yourself.
16. Being forced to masturbate beneath the table cloth while at a restaurant.
17. You both are sitting in a restaurant, dressed completely normal. She hands you a bag of ‘stuff’ and tells you to go to the restroom and change. You worry that everyone who enters will know what you are doing.
18. You are sitting drinking a beer or apple juice. When the glass is empty, she orders you to take it to the men’s room and fill it up. You must return and then consume your “new” beverage with your meal.
19. You must take your beverage to the men’s room, masturbate, and cum in the glass/cup. Return and then consume it.
20. You have to take your underpants off, return to the table and hand them to her. She leaves them on the table in plain view.
21. On a special evening, as you travel around in a rented limousine, you are required to masturbate, trying not to be seen by the driver.
22. You are required to masturbate in your pants and continue wearing them, disregarding any spots that may appear.
23. You are diapered, taken out to a restaurant or bar and have to consume a large quantity of liquid, and are not allowed to use the bathroom.
24. Travelling by car naked or dressed in lingerie.
25. You are obviously hand cuffed to the car as you travel, or are parked waiting for her to finish shopping. A key can be attached to a thread for emergency purposes.
26. Wearing lipstick or make up so that it appears you have just tried to remove it, but missed some.
27. Having your picture taken in Santa’s lap at Christmas time.
28. She hands the controls of your vibrating plug, dildo to another person.
29. Having to show another person what you are wearing beneath the raincoat or cape.
30. Shining her boots at the cafe.
31. She spanks you.
32. She slaps you.
33. You have to kiss the ground whenever you leave a car.
34. You kiss the seat of her chair whenever she stands.
35. Ordering warm milk, or some other almost impossible item, claiming dietary need.
36. You have to eat a bite of something that has had an ash flicked on it.
37. You are taken on a nature walk, tied to a tree, for a quickie spanking.
38. One hand is cuffed to the chair or table when you are eating.
39. At a cocktail lounge, you have to sit at the bar next to the serving station and you are cuffed to the rail.
40. You are instructed to eat a meal alone, reading a copy of Domination Directory International, other Dominatrix publication, or a transvestite magazine.
41. Smoking long, obviously feminine cigarettes.
42. In a parking lot or similar location, just before you will be safely hidden from spectators, she has you pause and wet yourself. You have to walk the last few yards with wet clothes.
43. On your ‘x’ anniversary, you renew your wedding vows, this time you are dressed as the bride.
44. When you travel alone, you are required to leave lingerie or stockings drying in the bathroom.
45. You are instructed to buy a Halloween maid’s costume. Whenever you travel you must leave it hanging in the hotel room along with your regular clothing. Leaving a pair of high heels out would work too.
46. Tape rough felt or very fine sandpaper inside a shirt over the nipples. Effect should be stimulation, not damage.
47. Reciting all your rules in front of others, at her whim.
48. Temporary “slave” tattoos or other markings, hidden or not.
49. Always walking a foot or two behind her. Speeding up to open doors.
50. She pays for everything, with possible comments like “Oh I never allow him to carry money!”
51. If no seats are available, puts you on all fours and sits on your back.
52. Doing some of the “hidden” little things like plugs, nipple clamps, cock rings, in the church of her/your choice.
53. Keeping your legs shaved.
54. Keeping the genitals shaved.
55. Having ribbons/bows braided into the genital hair.
56. Carrying a doll around, brushing its hair, playing with it.
57. When dining out, sub is not allowed to order, is fed little bites from her plate.
58. While she is sitting on a chair, you sit on deck beside her, even though there are chairs available next to you.
59. Wear a cock ring with a very long, strong, almost invisible thread attached. She can pull on this anytime. Use it like a leash.
Excellent list. A few to add to the list would be for him to attend a pool or hot tub party. He can leave his clothes in the bathroom but leave his panties peeking out of his pants quite a bit so everyone sees them and knows he was wearing them.
When you are out, have him join you for washroom breaks or go prepare the washroom for you by setting out toilet paper, making sure the seat is down etc. Or make him go in afterwards to flush and clean up.
Scold him for not holding doors etc for other women.
Send his humiliating pics to an anonymous pic posting site so they cant be removed. It’s anonymous, you can sign in to remove them.
Those are great ideas… thank you for adding!
my girlfriend likes to tie a leather lace to my cock as i’m wearing short shorts *blush*! it hangs down by my thigh…easy for her to play with!
For me, the most embarrassing situations I’ve been put in are in front of girls who are much younger then me or being at the mercy of a much younger girl. A grown man obeying a young girl is hard, but also young girls don’t care if a guy is embarrassed or if friends find out. She is apt to have friends around too. I have a group if girls that I have to shop for and buy makeup, clothes, lingerie and even tampons.
please add me to your mailing list
She drives me to a layby. Orders me onto the back seat, strip naked and pass all of my clothes to her. She then places them in the trunk. I have a choice. Leave the relative safety of the car to get them back and hope she doesn’t lock the doors or drive off leaving me naked. Or she drives home with me naked on the back seat, through the city centre, picking up a couple of her friends on the way.
Please add me to your email list.
I am a m2f Crossdresser
I love when my Mistress forces slaps my ass in public, and talks to me in a degrading voice, like I’m stupid. My cheeks get red but I always obey.
Im a sub and disciplined wife. I’m also a little who gets demoted to baby when my husband is very angry. We don’t hide our lifestyle. My punishments include being spanked after sloppy housework and having to redo it with him superving me while my pants are around my ankles. Sucking my thumb for sassiness no matter where we are.l Time outs in my play pen. He puts me on restriction, takes my phone and tells my friends I’m grounded. Making me stand in the corner after a spanking holding up my skirt to show my red bottom. But the absolute worst was when we had a party and I spent too long talking to one man. He grabbed my hand and took me to the bedroom and ordered me to strip. While I stood there naked, he told me how I had embarrassed him and how disappointed he was in me. I kinda had it coming. I was trying to make him jealous. I tried to apologise but he told me to put my thumb in my mouth and leave it there. He made me lie down and diapered me and put my rubber pants on. I thought I was getting an early bedtime, another punishment. But he pulled me through the kitchen grabbing my bottle and led me back to the party. He told everyone it was past my bedtime but he didn’t want me to miss the party. So, he put me in my play pen, made me lie down and told me to drink every bit of my bottle. People were coming up to me talking about how cute I looked in my pink rubber pants and saying I had big titties for a little girl. He even asked a female friend of ours to change me! But I will NEVER try to make my husband jealous again!
This is so hot
Help…! Help…! My wife is an insubordinate brat. She laughed at me this morning when I almost stepped in dog waste. She purposely waits until she knows I’m going to use the bathroom, then hides the toilet paper roll. I just don’t know how to get her to behave. This is serious business, and I’m a serious man…! I seriously have little time, and I have serious plans…!!
That sounds serious, Justin.
The wife and I ha e been married 10 years and after a year she got sick, so we stopped playing and after she got better from cancer we have had a hard time getting back she likes to be taken and humiliated but I have had trouble being consistent any ideas other than just do it. Thanks Brian
The wife and I ha e been married 10 years and after a year she got sick, so we stopped playing and after she got better from cancer we have had a hard time getting back she likes to be taken and humiliated but I have had trouble being consistent any ideas other than just do it. Thanks Brian
My woman got mad at me and made me walk home a 3 mile walk down a busy public road in some tight small ass briefs and that’s it she wouldn’t even let me wear shoes alot of cars slowed down staring and laughing at me it was the most humiliating thing ever but that was the only way she would forgive me
It depends otherwise I’m down, I’m not scared of it.
Some ideas that drive my partner crazy but he loves them!!
– He has a pretty small cock (particularly on soft) and hates having to get it out. He usually changes into swimming shorts before going out hahaha! Anyway, I like to make sure he doesn’t and has to get naked in the changing room. I make sure he does this and records/takes a pic as evidence (being conscious to only include himself). Absolutely hilarious as a punishment, particularly as he also struggles to then keep soft due to the embarresment
– I bought him a pair of speedos when we went on holiday and made him wear them (they were very tight!) from the hotel room down to the pool. I made sure I was carrying everything so he had nothing to cover up. Was in stiches watching him trying to keep it down (ofcourse I kept saying very teasing things), absolutely unable to hide anything with the embarresment of using his hands (which then made it obvious)
– Talking about an ex-partner, particularly when I orgasm or look at his body. Often do a side by side comparison from insta etc. which is great as he’s smaller in almost every way!
– One time one of his friends left his overnight bag. Guess who I made wear boxers over their head and dirty socks in mouth? He strugled with that but once he’s turned on then I can get him to do most things – and I like to push him. Great thing to tease him about hahaha especially when I ask him what his friend smells like and size would be.
Not up for doing anything properly involving anyone else but would be keen to hear some creative suggestions or comments, I’m sure there’s some more ideas I can share!!!
JD
Consent is no longer of any importance. I once commented about consent in a video where a woman wore a collar and a ball gag in public, including a boy about 11 passing nearby. The returned flames argued that wearing a ball gag in public is not BDSM.
WOW, some great ideas here. I have found a few others that work well training him. Sew all of the pockets shut on a few pairs of his slacks/pants/jeans. He will then be forced to carry everything in his hands, or in a purse . Swap out his wallet for a fem style one, pink works well for this., along with a matching phone case. Add a very girly key fob to his key ring. A trip to the mall, or a night out on the town, will never be the same.
this has really sparked my imagination, thank you.