Can Role-Play Add to the Pleasure That Pain Brings?

What’s in your sadomasochist (S/m) repertoire? If you think of role-play as “I’m the stern headmaster and you’re the naughty student” then some people enjoy that kind of play and some people don’t find much in it. In this context we’re talking about role-play as making up fictional characters or putting ourselves as real characters…

Brats, SAMs and Break-mes

Brats are possibly something of a misunderstood species. They get a bad rap by many in the community who immediately associate the role with “petulant child”. But is that really what a brat is? We’d call a child a brat if they’re misbehaving, but most submissives who identify as brats see it as a role…

Edging and Orgasm Control

Erotic sexual denial is a sexual practice in which a heightened state of sexual arousal is maintained for an extended length of time without orgasm. Commonly, most of us would probably call it “orgasm control”. For some, it’s a common part of a BDSM or sexual bondage scene. It can be short term or long term….

Your Kink is OK in DSM-5

The American Psychiatric Association depathologized sadism, masochism, cross-dressing and fetishes in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5) in 2013. The DSM-5 defines paraphilia as “any intense and persistent sexual interest other than sexual interest in genital stimulation or preparatory fondling.” A paraphilic disorder is a “paraphilia that is currently causing…

Which Shade of BDSM Will Set You Free?

by Becca (shadows-dance) I think every person’s kink is unique. Now let me explain myself. 🙂 I think of “kink” as a giant box of Crayolas. We all get one the second we decide that “vanilla” isn’t what we want. Sure, there’s a white crayon in the box, but it’s not our favorite. BDSM encompasses…

Illustrated Guide – Impact Sting Levels

We’ve reblogged this illustration from Boyfriend and ExBoyfriend BDSM Gallery. He’s got great taste in NSFW pics too. This is a regular series of illustrated guides. You can find the others here. impact play: Striking with various objects, including the hand (spanking), riding crops, floggers and whips and canes(oh, my!) – FetLife BDSM Glossary We…

Physical and Mental Techniques for Processing Pain

We spend a lot of time talking about pain and pleasure in the BDSM community. It’s a very individual thing, and we all have our own preferred levels, and our different responses to pain during a session. Athletes often have their own way of processing challenges to sustain themselves till the final line, and in…

Turning Pain Into Pleasure

Pain is a huge part of BDSM. We seem to talk about it all the time. But, language being the blunt instrument that it is, do we really understand each other when we say things like “hit me” or “i love pain”? For some people, pain directly equates to “abuse” or “self harm”, and there…

The Complex Relationship Between BDSM and Mental Illness

The relationship between BDSM and mental health is complex, and can be confusing. Take, for example, depression. For those in the BDSM community who suffer from depression, is there any relationship? And if there is, was there an attraction to BDSM because of (diagnosed or undiagnosed) depression? Does the BDSM make it better or worse?…

CBT – Cock and Ball Torture Part 2

By Fledermaus This is a continuation of the late Tony DeBlase’s article on Cock and Ball Torture posted here. URETHRAL INVASION Most heterosexual men consider the possibility of something inserted up their ass as the greatest invasion of personal privacy, possibly even more than the thought of a knife penetrating skin and muscle. But that…